About This Episode
Complex Trauma & Neurodivergence: Not Opposites, But Intertwined. We challenge the labels and redefine understanding through a lens that truly sees the nuances of human experience.
Connect
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About This Episode
Trauma, Neurodivergence, and the Nervous System: Why Women Feel Misdiagnosed
Lauren Tobey describes feeling unseen by a two-week symptom checklist and argues many women are labeled with depression, anxiety, ADHD, or borderline traits without the system addressing sustained threat in the nervous system. She explains that complex PTSD isn’t included in the DSM despite long-standing research and WHO recognition in ICD-11, which affects billing, training, and diagnosis, leading clinicians to code symptoms instead of prolonged trauma. She connects the 2018–2025 global trauma period to widespread mislabeling as a “depression epidemic.” Tobey outlines how trauma and neurodivergence overlap in brain systems, increasing misdiagnosis risk, especially with late ADHD/autism identification and masking. She introduces The Spiral Framework—Ashes, Ember, Flame, Rise—emphasizing nervous system states and state-dependent learning over labels, offers practical guidance on assessment and avoiding research as avoidance, and references her book “Spiraling Into Control” and The Spiral app.
Timestamps
00:00 Two Week Checklist Fails
01:48 Mislabels and Missing Context
03:20 Why CPTSD Is Ignored
05:39 Pandemic Trauma Misread
06:26 ADHD vs Survival Mode
09:26 Autism Masking and Misdiagnosis
11:24 Nervous System Over Labels
13:41 Where Trauma Meets Neurodivergence
15:19 Shutdown and Burnout
17:12 Hypervigilance and Sensitivity
19:26 Identity Erosion and Grief
21:32 Shame Spiral and Self Blame
22:51 State Over Diagnosis
26:40 Spiral Framework States
30:19 Practical Next Steps
33:55 Closing and Resources
About The Spiral Podcast
The Spiral Podcast is where the work breathes out loud. Each episode expands what the writing opens — through lived experience, nervous system science, and the kind of conversation that happens at the kitchen table after the kids are asleep. Hosted by Lauren Tobey, author of Spiraling Into Control and creator of The Spiral Framework.
New episodes every Tuesday.
Keywords
nervous system, trauma, spiraling, The Spiral Framework, Ashes, Ember, Flame, Rise, survival mode, nervous system regulation, complex trauma, cPTSD, identity erosion, relational trauma, high-functioning, polyvagal, nervous system states, Lauren Tobey, Spiraling Into Control
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